Tag Archives: Dating

When Being a Southern Belle Goes Wrong…

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By: Shea Harris

This post is dedicated to all my Southern Belle’s. I know your pain girl. I understand where you’re coming from. You’re not the only one going through this. I want you to know that I love you and support you. Haha! Okay let me stop playing. So today I was texting my friends about a situation and I said Y’all need to teach me how to be mean! I’ve noticed that as a Southern Belle I enter a situation with one expectation and end with a different result. Most of the time its not in my favor.

Being Too Nice Leads To a Number

So I’ve noticed in different situations that when I communicate with people, I kind of give them too much attention. In my mind I think I’m just being nice, courteous and showing a bit of Southern hospitality that’s missing in their life. In their mind, they pretty  much think I’m interested. Now sometimes I’m interested, but then again sometimes I’m not. I don’t really know how to be mean to people unless they piss me off. Whenever I meet someone, I just go in thinking I should network. You never know whose company you can benefit from.

Being Too Nice Leads to Getting Ran Over

Usually when you’re nice, people take your kindness for weakness. It sucks, but apparently that’s the way life is set up. It’s been so many times when people thought they could do any little thing around me and then I had to check them. It’s either a firm cursing out or the coldest stale face. Moving to South Florida from North Carolina, people always tell me Shea you’re too nice. I stick out like a sore thumb in a room filled with South Florida natives. I’m not sure if it’s my bubbly personality, my southern hospitality or both. What it comes down to is that when people see someone nice, they usually take them as a push over.

Being Too Nice Leads to More Work

This can be pertaining to your work life or your side hustle. For me its definitely both. I’ve noticed that my genuine spirit leads to more responsibilities. It’s difficult for me to hand off projects to other people because I’m always more concerned about their well being. When no one else can be counted on, I can be. Not even trying to toot my own horn, it’s just a fact. I’m usually the one to step up when things get a bit crazy. When it comes to my side hustle, I’m the only one that runs this. I don’t feel comfortable with building a team and I can’t pay them the amount of money they deserve. I wouldn’t mind getting interns, but I hate asking people for help. Sounds dumb, but it’s something I’ve struggled with since I was a child. 

Are you a Southern Belle or someone from the true South? Any of these sound familiar? Let me know in the comments below! Until next time! 😘

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Dating in Miami

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By: Shea Harris

As I sip on this strawberries and cream frappucino with toffee nut in the local Starbucks, I’m blasting Single by Lil Wayne.  Some of the repetitive questions I’ve gotten over this past year are as follows: How’s the dating life? How’s the dating scene? Are you dating? I would say getting asked these questions gets annoying, but I’ve gotten used to it. So here’s my answer to those questions: Chaaa I don’t know. Okay that sounds kind of bad, but it’s the truth. I’ve met some pretty interesting men out here: men I’m attracted to and men not so much attracted to me. Usually when I see post about the single life, I see people bashing the opposite sex. Well I can honestly only be responsible for myself so in the next few paragraphs I’ll be listing a few thing that have come to me while being single.

I’m About That Action

I will say it time and time again: I’m 👏🏾 About 👏🏾 That 👏🏾 Action! It’s so many times that people say they want to see me (whether it be family or friends) and I’m down for it. If there aren’t any actions behind it, I’m not going to invest my time and energy into it. There is literally a list of things I could be doing besides taking time out to hang out with folks. If I really want to see you, I’m going to see you. This probably sounds super clichè, but I’m pretty sure there’s a reason for the phrase actions speak louder than words. I understand some people aren’t as vocal as others but to be real, the only thing I can go off of are actions. If I’m out here willing to make moves, the moves should be reciprocated (or so I think).

I’m Very Unique

I know we’re all special and unique in our own special way, but there are certain aspects about me that stick out like a sore thumb. My two puff balls and country accent don’t define me, but they stand out. My facial expressions and my personality are out of this world. When I walk into the room with my head held high and read your mind, trust me I know it’s extraordinary and catches you off guard. I make several announcements without uttering more than 2 sentences (when you first meet me 😉). I don’t think men are used to meeting a woman like me, trust me even my friends make the 😳 face sometimes. The only thing I can do as a human is be completely honest with you. There’s no need for me to lie or try and hypnotize you with cute little actions. I’m good off that lol.

I’m Not In A Rush

I’m pretty sure majority of the men out here think women are rushing to get into a relationship, marriage or something of that nature. I can honestly say I’m out here enjoying my life. I’ve learned over time that you cant force anyone into anything. Actually, you cant force anything period! Let’s be real: I’ll be 25 next month and I’ve changed so much within one year. I’m still figuring out my likes, dislikes, style, hair, all of the above. I’m currently at a stage in my life where I’m just taking everything as it comes and being the best person I can be. No need to rush into something and I’m still learning more about myself. If something happens, it happens; if it doesn’t, trust me I’ll be okay lol.

If you’re single, how is dating in your city? Is it as complex as people make it seem or is it pretty much nonexistent? Comment below and let me know!